Monday, December 29, 2008

The Great Depression 2

It’s scary out there, no doubt about it. But; don’t panic, with our help you can get through this and live to see Obama impeached for diddling a male intern, I’m just saying. In these uncertain times you’re likely to discover that alcohol will become an important coping tool. After all, when did you ever see the drunks on an airplane panic when the captain reports engine trouble? While the teetotalers are making deals with God, wetting their pants and running up and down the aisle with their hair on fire; the inebriated are in the back of the plane singing, “Red Neck Mother”. All I’m saying is consider vast quantities of booze; and, by the way, I recommend Kentucky bourbon. It’s as smooth as a prom queens thighs and only half as risky.

As economic Armageddon befalls every financial sector you will suffer, “Social collapse run-down economic woes ebullition derangement” or “SCREWED”. And; while there isn’t a cure there is a treatment. Pharmaceutical trials have shown Thorazine to be effective in treating, “SCREWED”. Side Effects include drooling, lazy eye, hallucinations, hair loss, sexual side effects, seizures, anal leaking, Chlamydia, diaper rash, bleeding gums, bubble butts, suicide, sewer rats, thumb sucking, necrophilia, necropsy, warts, freckles, coma, whimpering and death. As with all medicines, consult your healthcare provider before taking any medication. If you don’t want to get, “Screwed” consider Thorazine. Thorazine also comes in a colorful, cherry flavor for children and is safe for infants. Pick some up today!

Sooner or later it’s going to happen. You’ll be standing on a street corner trying to talk yourself out of jumping in front of the next bus. That’s normal; trust me. It’s not going to be easy keeping a positive attitude with the world falling down around you. However; there are proven techniques you can employ to, “Sunny up” your horizons. We suggest Hookers. That’s right; hookers. Cheap hookers will put a smile on your face and a song in your heart. And; under an Obama administration they are tax deductible. If you’re really lucky you’ll get a fatal STD that will put you out of your misery. When visiting that hooker, be sure you tell her Conservative Springfield sent you. You’ll get a discount and we’ll get our cut. Everybody wins!

In trying times it always makes you feel better when you come across someone worse off than you. That’s just human nature. When you’re really down we suggest visiting an orphanage, burn unit, critical care facility or morgue. Once you see just how destitute, despondent and dead others are, you can’t help feeling better about yourself. After all; it’s all about perspective and your relative position to those less fortunate than you. So, revel in someone else’s misery and feel better about your lot in life. Proving, once again, misery does love company.

Just a couple more tips. Taking for granted that you will lose your home shortly after Obama takes office you’ll be shopping for an apartment or refrigerator box. Make sure to get one on the first floor. As your depression about the depression worsens, you will be tempted to jump out the window.
If for any reason you have to replace your stove; get electric, not gas. That way, when you feel the urge to put your head in the oven, you’ll just singe a little hair.
Just remember; whatever’s left after four years of Obama we can sell to Mexico for kindling. I’m just saying.
Conservative Springfield 29 DEC 08

Monday, December 22, 2008

Evil Conservative Industries

Here at Evil Conservative Industries we care aboutpeople, people who
need people. After all, they’re the luckiest people in the world. Evil
Conservative Industries is not only the largest producer of gruel for
orphanages; oh no, our company is gearing up for the future in many
capital ventures. And, with the Obama inauguration right around the
corner you’ll want to know just how we plan on surviving the, “Obama
years” and what we can do for you.
That’s why we’re proud to announce our partnership with Acme Education
and Yahoo to bring a product right into your home and don’t you want
to know what it is? Our top flight researchers have calculated an 80%
unemployment rate soon after Barry blows into Washington and a 110%
federal tax on the 20% still employed. We don’t have to tell you,
that’s bad news. Unless, you are prepared for the new economy and have
the skills it will take to survive. That’s where we come in folks.
We’re offering online educational courses that will guarantee
prosperity for you and your family during the, “Barry Years”. What
could be more important to you? For a small fee* you too can live
through this nightmare and vote Palin in 2012.
Just take the time to look through the career options we offer online
and choose the career that best suits you. After all; we’re all in
this together.

High Classed Whore, or Lo Class Ho
Syllabus: How to pick a pimp
How to hide money from your pimp
Shopping for a lawyer
Spotting a good bail bondman
Condoms 101
Competitive pricing
Product advertisement and marketing
Hygiene
Spandex
How to manage the police
How to make that corner pay

Look at it this way; The Elliot Spitzer girl made $4000 an hour.
Disclaimer, “There is no way your fat ass will make $4000 and hour”.
However, even a tubby like you could make $10 and hour in the hood;
times 400 hours and there you go!

Pick Pocket Artist
Syllabus: Pick a pocket and get paid
Grafting
How to spot a rube
Making prison a positive
The pigeon swap techniques
Pursuing purses
Carnival classics
Flim Flam Fun

Picking pockets isn’t just a career choice. It’s also a neat trick at
parties, dinners or barmitsvas.

Insurance Scammer
Syllabus: This class has been filled with Trial Lawyers

Loan Shark
Syllabus: Knee capping
Gangster Vernacular
Bribing beat cops
Cement Shoes
Occupational math and the, “Vig”
Positive point spreads for professionals
How to beat the street 101

Pimp
Syllabus: The Social stigma of bitch slapping
Popular Whore holdout spots
Tricks of the trade
Fashion
Pimpin yo ride
Verbiage; I.E. “Yo, Yo, Yo lil’ mama, wutz poppin wich
yo fine lookin self’?
Pimp walkin’
Flashin’ yo cash 101

Shoplifting
Syllabus: Grab and Dash
Fake pregnancy holdout
Where security won’t look
Is that a CD in your pocket or are you happy to see
me?
Be the felony

Competitive Eating
Syllabus: Purging Plans
Gut Busters
Tummy tricks
Gas avoidance
Keg abs

Panhandler
Syllabus: Forlorn facial expression
Brother can you spare a dime?
Medical excuses
Fake limping
Bum lingo

Community organizing
Syllabus: Rabble rousing
Effective protesting
Sign design
Tax dodges
Scamming for success
Taking it to the streets

*Fee may be extremely large
Conservative Springfield 23 DEC 08

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

It is End-Time

I know what you’re thinking; when I predicted gloom and doom, despair and desperation, an economy on the precipice; you scoffed from behind your rose colored glasses, wrote me off as a short busser, then continued down Pollyanna road. Now; oh now, the very financial wisdom I postulated, posited and spoke of so pointedly seems quite prophetic and proper. It is the financial end-time but it’s worse than even I put forth. The housing market meltdown, “via the sub-prime debacle” was only the first shoe to drop. There are at least shoe stores of shoes dropping behind curtain number two; unbeknownst to Middle America or Obama voters.

As America is focused on the chia pet, “Rod Blagoyavich”, those wacky, loveable leftists that burned to the ground Sarah Palin’s church, the shoe size of Baghdad reporters, Rome is burning and the left is buying marshmallows. Pay attention here as this is likely to be one of the best economics lessons you’ve ever had. And, for free; I make economics interesting. Even for Obama voters.

The sub-prime meltdown has gone global and seeped into commercial properties. Investors Business Daily predicts a forty percent occupancy rate within two years. That’s shoe number two. Clodhopper three is the ballooning un-employment numbers that are increasing prime rate defaults. Nike® number four is much more Machiavellian and diabolical. High un-employment, sub-prime defaults, commercial defaults and prime defaults produce what we are seeing in California; contracted revenues to local, state and federal receipts. As government continues to expand to the, “be-all, end-all” of the huddled masses, this financial train is coming down the mountain at break neck speed, brakes be damned and will come off the tracks.

The Federal Reserve, also known as, “the financial stooges” intends to combat the fiduciary meltdown by throwing pies at each other, poking each other in the eye, yuk, yuk, and lowering interest rates to zero or less, ala Alan Greenspan. Note; economics lesson number one. Cheap money always finds a home. Not always a good home, but a home. Cheap money after 911 has a symbiotic duality of shared responsibility with those cheese eating, rat faced democrats whom cheerleadered Fannie and Freddie, the root of all evil.

Present day; enter George Bush, Hank Paulson et al. As a conservative I have a reoccurring dream that, “Darth Vader”, Dick Cheney, quietly suffocates the compassionate conservative and takes his rightful place on the throne. I mean really; we are going to spend our way out of debt? Not bloody likely mate! Try that in your personal finances.

The Federal Reserve is investing $billions in T- bills with a guaranteed return of rate at zero. If that’s not the rooster crowing at midnight I don’t know what is. It’s also called inventing money. Look this is simple; and, it’s simply explained. Recently a representative of Israel revealed a conversation that he had held with our President. It went as so; Bush told, “HIM” that America would always be there for Israel, provided that we survived. Commodity sellers are predicting gold at $2000 an ounce next year. The dollar is falling with oil though oil is pegged to the dollar. We are seeing record deflation. Short sellers have taken over Wall Street. The Fed, Treasury and option sellers are running around like their hair is on fire. It is the financial end-time; it’s just no one wants to admit it, yet.

Depressions are the frog in ever an increasing hot water kettle. Regardless of your historical perspective or education, America did not enter a depression with the crashing markets of 1929. No; soon after the crash, markets spiked and ebbed. That is, until government got involved. We are the only country that refers to the worldwide depression as, “the great depression”. Because; we are the only country to suffer it for a decade, thanks to our benevolent government. We are pursuing the same track as the linear thoughts of Hoover and Roosevelt. Government intrusion in markets only insures everlasting harm.

It would seem that no government wants a little pain on their watch. Instead, punting great pain; ala kicking the can down the road, onto the next generation. Doing so only makes the looming crisis larger while mortgaging our children’s future. But now, the road is a dead end for the can. It is the end time, buckle up, it’s apt to get bumpy from here.

What to watch for. Treasury notes are yielding zero return. T-bills are simply American debt. Foreign countries have stopped buying our debt, knowing we can never possibly repay. And; the final shoe to drop will be a run on the dollar. When this happens we’ll, “overnight” turn into a third world, banana republic, looking to Mexico for aid.

What we could do but won’t, and why. While it isn’t possible to avoid a great deal of financial pain there are things, “legitimate practices” our government could so engage. First, we could repeal the compliance hindrances that government has shackled business with. Then we could apply common sense initiatives, such as a flat corporate tax rate of five percent. Applying the same rate to capital gains taxes would infuse private investment into industry and spawn the erection of industrial infrastructure. Manufacturing jobs would tsunami back to our shores as producers enjoy the benefit of production near consumption.

Of course, we will never do that, preferring to go down with the ship, as it were. Democrats will never accept a lowering of taxes on evil corporations as they are the genesis of class warfare. And, even if they were predisposed to do so, Russia, China and India all have much lower corporate tax rates than we do. They would never abide industry returning to America. For if we endeavored to do this, these countries would flood the world with our dollars, collapsing our economy. So, as I said, and will stand firmly by, “It is the End Time”.
Conservative Springfield 17 Dec 08
It is End-Time

Thursday, December 11, 2008

President Joe Biden

Whenever someone tells me, “move along, nothing to see here” I get suspicious. So, with the news media, the Obama camp and legal beagles coming out of the woodwork to emphasize the seven degrees of separation between Governor Rod Blagojevich and Barack Yo’ Mama, my spidy senses start twitching.
Living in Illinois I can attest to this; we’ve known for years what the rest of the country is only now finding out, our governor has treated the electorate of this state much like a baby treats a diaper. The citizenry of the state saw this coming. We had only hoped the arrest of this rube to be more akin to Rodney King than Scooter Libby; maybe next time.


Though expected, there are aspects of this case that seem to make little or no sense. First, leaks don’t come out of the U.S. attorneys’ office in Chicago. It just doesn’t happen. Say what you will about Patrick Fitzgerald, “and I’ve said a lot” he runs a tight ship and suffers not fools. Yet, as soon as the ink was dry on federal warrants to wiretap governor “hairball”, the Chicago Tribune had the story and prepared to run it. Fitzgerald got them to hold the story until one week before the arrest. Meaning, the leak had to have come from the FBI, who, by the way, will have none other than Barry-O appointing a new director in a few weeks.
Coincidentally, Valerie Jarrett, Barry’s choice to replace him, withdrew her name from consideration just as the Chicago Tribune printed the story revealing governor Rod had become an audiophile. Why did she suddenly stop wanting to be a United States senator with all of the accompanying graft? Hmmm….


Another thing; I’m not for one second buying this altruism defense of Elliot Ness in shutting down this investigation when he did so. It’s beginning to look like Pat was more afraid of whom he might catch in his net than the bass he’d already boated. It’s lunacy to shut down an investigation before the actual crime being investigated is committed.


In legal terms all we have here is intent and possibly a conspiracy. For binding legal precepts, “what is needed” is an offer, acceptance and consideration. This case represents only one of the three binds. A stated fear that the governor might actually commit the crime and appoint a senator is at best disingenuous. A legal remedy would have been available. Fitzgerald could have ridden in on his white horse, exposed the bribe along with the briber, tracked the exchange of compensation, slapped the cuffs on the perps and give us the perp walk we were denied. The Senate would have never allowed that senator in waiting to be seated and we could begin construction of the Illinois wing at the Federal penitentiary.


No, there’s something here that doesn’t pass the smell test. And, don’t even think this is the end of governor, “hot Rod”. He isn’t wired like that. You can bet he is setting in his office taking offers of large dough to keep his mouth shut. Why do you think the democratically controlled, Illinois house of representatives is balking at impeachment? You can bet your grannies homemade apple pie recipe that he has dirt on all the leadership. That’s just the way Illinois works.


Back to Obama; it’s well known around Chicago that federal investigators have been roaming the city and paying special attention to real estate brokers. In particular those involved with the sale of Hyde Park properties owned by one Anthony Rezko and Hussein Obama. Evidently Mr. Rezko has been very helpful in these endeavors. Perhaps now we’ll see just how, “law and order” Patrick Fitzgerald is. Can you say President Joe Biden?

Conservative Springfield 12 DEC 08

Monday, December 8, 2008

All We Have To Fear Is Government

The economy has gotten so bad, that even prostitutes are instituting a buy one get one free policy and getting in line for a government bailout. Come to think of it; the executives of the big three auto companies have a lot in common with these working girls. They’ll do any for money too. At least the working girls are providing a service in demand.
Now the states ‘hat in hand ’are joining the bailout line along with the RICHIE Richs’s of wall street, Tom, Dick and Harry, Insurance companies, credit card lenders, media outlets , Fannie, Freddie and Fonzie, major banks, and coming to a theater near you, drug dealers from the hood.

Look; here’s what you need to know………
This alphabet bailout has as much chance of working as Senator Robert Byrd has of forming a coherent thought, Not Bloody Likely!
Ignoring the equal protection clause our Federal government has taken upon itself the ordained responsibility of picking winners and losers. Those taxpayers working in factories owned by Nissan, Toyota, Honda and Kia located within our borders will be “through forced benevolence” counted upon to support the very companies they are competing against. Think of it this way; you make DVD’s for a living and are forced to subsidize your neighbor who produces VHS tapes and buys houses he can ill afford. After all; just add Mom, apple pie and Chevrolet; Then Ford, Chrysler and Citibank. It’s like Threes Company without Mr. Roper. All punch lines with no straight man or straight talk

“The Senate banking”, committee; along with the era of central planning” “socialist cabal, I.E. Ben Bernake, Henry Paulson ET. Al.” has taken upon them the mantle of but plug to the American economy, when what needed be is a fire hydrant enema of biblical proportions. The only arbitrator of success should be the market. {Emphasis Mine} Capitalism is simply the Freedom to engage in commerce.

Provided autonomy; markets work, capital seeks profit, production, equity and competence is rewarded. Conversely; Incompetence, government influence and irresponsible leverage is punished.
The business model of capitalism, “left to its own devices” cannot be improved upon or tweaked by government. Capitalism doesn’t pick winners or losers; it simply defines success and failure by rewarding one and punishing the other.

Enter GSE’s or “government sponsored entities”, also known as, “destructive economics”. This phenomenon began with Fannie and Freddie and has spread like a virus into our banking system, corporate America and soon to the big three. Ostensibly, GSE’s cannot fail as they are backed by the full faith and fortune of the government, our tax dollars. Taking failure off the table removes accountability and adulterates capitalism into socialism. Capitalism distributes wealth unequally; Socialism distributes poverty equally.

The government’s rationale for dog-piling itself into every nook and cranny of our economy is the dark and barren financial predictions of doom and gloom, the end of time. Obama claims to create two million jobs with his autocratic benevolence.

Back to destructive economics; I can create jobs in my home town by breaking every plate glass, storefront window in the downtown area. Glaziers would hire more employees, glass suppliers would boom and window installers would be taking whole hogs home instead of just the bacon. But, I have created those jobs by taking money out of pocket, “A” just to put it in pocket, “B”; destructive economics. This is government job creation in a nutshell.
It’s too dangerous a time in the yet un-written history of America for our benefactors in Washington to be fiddling while Main Street burns. Our economy is in deflation, a much more serious financial ill than its evil symbiotic twin; inflation. Deflations result in depressions; inflation is part and parcel to recessions. Deflation is simply too many goods and services chasing too few dollars. Inflation is too many dollars chasing too few goods and services. It’s fairly simple and doesn’t require a degree in higher math.

Here comes Uncle Sam, at a time when government should be seen and not heard. Treasury is loaning $trillions of dollars to banks who in turn are buying other banks and, “you guessed it” buying treasury bills. Think of it as the banks putting all of their money under the mattress.

What government can do? Frankly, we’d be money ahead just to pay congress to go on vacation for a couple of years. Anything they do, “short of nothing” will only exacerbate current financial woes and insure America suffers the great depression two.

As government jumps into our markets with both feet and takes warrants in our financial and industrial markets they reinforce investor’s fears. Literally $6 trillion dollars of investment equity remains sidelined in fear of competing with Uncle Sam and his striped, deep pockets.
For instance; will Toyota, Nissan, Honda, Kia, et al. continue to transplant factories into this country, knowing the united auto workers have access to the treasury of the United States?

Conversely; what investor would employ capital into General Motors knowing full well that common stock in GM® now takes a back seat to the federal government and 330 million Americans?

Though it isn’t represented in the text of our constitution, we are incessantly beat over the head with the liberal mantra, “separation of church and state”. For our union to survive I would postulate this; what we should abide is a separation of capitalism and government.
Conservative Springfield 09 DEC 08

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Soliais,

Republican Sen. Saxby Chambliss, fresh off his victory over challenger Jim Martin in the Georgia Senate runoff, told FOX News Wednesday that campaign trail appearances by Sarah Palin helped put him over the top.

Both candidates brought in heavy hitters to stump for them in the final days before the runoff.

Former President Bill Clinton and former Vice President Al Gore hit the stump for Martin. And a host of candidates from the GOP presidential primary, including GOP nominee John McCain, stumped for Chambliss.

"We had some great folks in. Obviously, you want to peak on the last day, and we had John McCain and Mike Huckabee and Governor Romney and Rudy Giuliani," Chambliss told FOX News.

But he said Palin, who showed up for rallies in Georgia on Monday, had the most impact

Monday, December 1, 2008

The Battle for the Republican Party

A recent poll confirms what we conservatives have known for some time; we want Sarah. This scares Republicans and Democrats alike; yet for diametrical different causes. The GOP fears Palin for what she is and represents. Governor Palin is a conservative, not a milquetoast, knee wobbly Republican with wetted finger always in the air. No, she is a dyed in the wool, self made giant killer. Just ask the Republican machine in Alaska. She not only took on the corrupt GOP machine in Alaska, she sent a lot of Republicans to jail. She doesn’t play ball, she doesn’t go along to get along. This scares the hell out of the RNC and is evident by the Republican senate majority leader in Juno. With a stroke of her pen the majority leader could have ended the senate investigation into, “trooper gate” faster than Obama can hide his birth certificate. She encouraged the investigation because she is still part of the dismantled Republican machine in Juno. And, she holds a grudge.
Conversely, Democrats fear Palin because in her they see Reagan. They see a confident, affable, straight talker that they know will resonate with the American people. This is why she must be destroyed; and, make no mistake; they will attempt to do so. Just as soon as the Obamagasm wears off.
For you conspiracy kooks out there who remain convinced that the CIA killed Kennedy and Sarah Palin hurt the McCain campaign it’s probably time to get off the smoke-able herbs and cactus flowers. I’m just saying.
To the time machine Mr. Wizard! {Back to August 2007} There was as much enthusiasm for John McCain in the Republican Party as there is for cold gruel in an orphanage. Let’s face it; McCain has the personality of cardboard. Oh, and there was that amnesty thing, the gang of fourteen, McCain Feingold, his opposition to tax cuts and a bad comb-over.
Palin on the ticket ensured he wouldn’t lose by double digits. If we are to be pragmatic we would admit this election was almost certain to sway Democrat. Americans were war weary, the economy tanked, the media swooned and Brittney shaved her head. Comparatively it’s somewhat of a miracle Obama didn’t win all fifty-seven states.
It’s probably too early to be putting up your Palin for President Yard signs, “at least wait until Obama is inaugurated” but a recent poll suggests she is the darling of the GOP and an ever omnipresent force in the political arena. We will see. What we know is this; there is a battle for the soul of the Republican Party. It’s the Christians and Lions all over again. Except this time the Lions are conservatives.
Conservative Springfield 02 DEC 08

Monday, November 24, 2008

I had a Dream

What’s more than obvious is this; when it comes to solving the financial meltdown, the inmates are running the asylum. It’s almost like high school kids are running the show and if the subject matter were not so serious it might be entertaining, to a degree. What we can ascertain is this truism; not one pencil pushing idiot in charge of this bailout has any idea what to do or when to do it. Perhaps we should have drafted doctors in this fiduciary endeavor as the first rule of medicine is, “do no harm”.
What the Federal Reserve, along with the treasury has done is to create a never ending line of corporate hobos, “tin can in hand” lined up around the block, waiting to get into the treasury soup kitchen. Though, it is fun to watch them grovel.

Look, as faithful readers you can attest to my humility and self deprecation. Can’t you? Still, having the solution to all life’s frailties and foibles, economic or otherwise, it is my moral imperative to shower knowledge upon those less synapsetic endowed.

Plus, this isn’t that hard. An economic collapse had to occur. True, the democrats shifted this bad boy into high gear with their, “oversight” of the evil twins; “Fannie and Freddie” yet, they only laid the inevitable on the American doormat. And, by the way, made millions doing it; thanks democrats. We owe you.

We’ve all heard of the rust belt, the diminishing industrial base, declining manufacturing. It’s really simple; we have driven industry out of this country. Blame the uncertain labor market, “unions”, the second highest corporate tax rates in the entire world, compliance regulations, environmental terrorists, college graduates whom aren’t smarter than a fifth grader wading into the labor pool, state tax rates, municipal tax rates, energy costs, health care costs, insurance costs, trial lawyers, OSHA, lazy employees and Miley Cirus. Gee, why wouldn’t a company want to do business here?

No, we have driven manufacturing out of this country and metamorphosed into a service economy, think dishwashers and waitresses. A full seventy percent of our GDP is based upon citizens purchasing goods and services that we don’t make here. We purchase products from India, China and Japan while borrowing the money to purchase these imports from India, China and Japan. These countries are loaning us the money to purchase their products thinking that someday we’ll be good for it. It’s the classic bend over and, “take the money” scheme.

It is untenable, unattainable, unsustainable, unprofitable and unwise. And, it can be repaired. Corporate taxes are merely a built in tax on consumerism. For the most part corporations build in that tax on their good or service, making American made products more expensive and unable to compete in the world marketplace. Combine the simple fact that we are the world’s largest consumers with the knowledge that companies want to make their products here, “shipping costs” it would seem that the square peg will fit in the round hole.

In the short term, government will have to do with less, a concept unknown to Washington proper. Were we to cut corporate taxes to, say…., zero, and cap capital gain tax at five percent, the entire industrial world would be beating down our door. Good jobs would ensue, the tax base would grow exponentially and the birds would again sing.
It is estimated that there is over $7 trillion dollars in offshore accounts waiting for opportunity. Ironically, that exact figure is what we have spent battling our economic woes. That surely worked out well; didn’t it? Still, Obama has one card; if he’ll play it.

Economist Christina Romer will be director his Council of Economic Advisors, which provides economic analysis and advice to the president. Christy is a supply sider; a brilliant economist and one tough broad. It makes me wonder how she finagled an appointment from the messiah. However, if his most merciful listens to this woman, “and ignores the advice of Larry Summers” the Conservative Springfield plan has a chance. Hey, we all know one thing; Obama knows as much about economics as Paris Hilton knows about wearing panties. He will have to rely on advisers. Frankly; I doubt Obama can do simple math.
Fair Points; Christina is also in favor of enforcing the up tick rule wherein short sellers can only dabble in markets with an upside, abolishing mark to market rules, naked shorts and whitey tighties.

So…….this could work. Provided Obama turns his back on the rabid left, slaps down the democratically controlled congress, snubs the press, ignores all but one of his economic advisers, puts Michelle back in the kitchen and gives up his political future. Also, he may have to take up smoking, again. Ah well, I guess I was dreaming.
Conservative Springfield 25 NOV 08

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The Apocolypse

Gee Wally; though I am hesitant to say I told you so, I did. As the Dow races to 7000 my prophetic, prescient, almost clairvoyant predictions of an economic apocalypse are tragically coming to fruition. Yet, it will get much, much worse; trust me. The vaunted $700 billion, “shuck and jive” has been as effective in loosening credit markets as Al Gore has been at losing weight. He’s still a fat bastard and our financial markets are circling the bowl. Here’s what you need to know.

It’s too late to prop up our financial markets. The fire started by Democrat holdovers, flunkies and thieves in Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac has spread from our financials to industrials and even to internet advertising; ala Google’s dive today. Also note Yahoo is almost free and CBS is on life support at $5.00 a share. My point; every sector of our economy is in full nose dive.

Just for kicks, let’s quickly stroll down memory lane and examine the cause of this winter of our discontent. Democrat hacks at Fannie and Freddie used sex, lies and videotape to cook the books, receive millions in target bonus’s and got congress to look the other way by bribing Democrats in the senate, “when republicans were in charge” and by bribing a lot of Democrats when they were in charge. Who said public service doesn’t pay? As republicans and President Bush were ringing the bell and shouting fire, democrats and the media minimized the alarm while shouting, “Racists pigs”.

Fannie and Freddie currently hold $6 trillion dollars in toxic mortgages but, that doesn’t tell the whole story. Through the halls of these evil twins passed $50 trillion dollars in toxic mortgages. These mortgages were explicitly given to unqualified buyers, bundled together in hundreds of billions of dollar packages and securities were sold around the world with the collateral being these toxic, worthless mortgages. All the while, Democrats fiddled, as the world burned. As these mortgages defaulted, the securities backed by them became worthless. Companies holding these securities, overnight had seen their balance sheets lose trillions. The financial markets went into freefall. As the tsunami swept through the financials credit markets froze. Industries hadn’t the ability to short term borrow. Major stock indexes tanked; oil futures spiraled and even deflation of macro commodities ensued. It turned out to be an excrement sandwich. And, it’s only begun. It will get biblical; trust me, I have predicted this all.

As expected, Democrats will bail out the car companies, insuring that they will indeed fail. This will spike unemployment into double digits and continue the domino sequential falling of economic indicators. While deflation will headline on the world stage, briefly, our most merciful government, under the messiah, “Barry O” massive capital infusions into the economy will rush, “fresh of the printing presses” into the economy, causing inflation percentages of 1000 percent; minimum. Prime Fed rates will approach 25% in an effort to curb inflation. The housing market will be destroyed, along with the seven or eight hundred businesses’s relying on it.

A world wide depression will ensue. Yet, it will be a gradual decline; much like easing into a too hot bathtub. At the height of the second great depression America will have a 70% unemployment rate. Most workers, “still employed” will be employed by the government. There will be a 30% homeless rate and the end of western civilization will be at hand. In the first great depression America was much more rural, more self sufficient. Today we are more urban, more dependent on government, more hapless. We’ve lost that rugged individualism that our founders embodied and this nation was born with. We are spoiled, rich and sassy; unable to hunt, to fish, to grow our own food.
Still, pause and reflect if you will, for in every calamity there is a teachable moment. Perhaps, just perhaps, as the phoenix rises from the ashes, whenever that future time is, it will be ingrained into the American psyche and told around the campfires dotted across these fruited plains. Liberalism is not tenable, it never was.
Conservative Springfield 20 NOV 08

Monday, November 17, 2008

Whatever the problem; Democrats created it

If within America there still resided a responsible news media, just admitting to being a democrat would be enough to get you tarred, feathered and railroaded out of town. Such vitriol would inhabit the populace were the unvarnished truth ever be told, en masse. I can safely postulate this premise knowing full well that were the electorate ever dutifully informed as to the depth of treachery visited on this country by democrats much of the democratic leadership would be hanging in the town square.

Take the current auto crisis of the big three. General Motors, for instance, is paying pensions and healthcare costs for 879,000 retirees and medical insurance benefits for 1.2 million family members. By the way, these are exorbitant costs for non-productive persons. And, as the saying goes, “hey, GM made these deals”. It isn’t as simplistic as that. I’m certain everyone with ears has heard health benefits were ingrained during the great American depression. The myth goes; There was a severe shortage of money so…to attract employees many companies offered healthcare benefits to compliment meager salaries. You’ve heard that, right? Well Joseph Lunchbox you’ve been scammed. Companies did not offer healthcare to employees before the great depression and only did during the depression because of wage and price controls instituted by that well known socialist, Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Employer sponsored medical insurance was practically thrust upon business under Roosevelt and with it, immediately, healthcare costs began to rise exponentially.

Yet, FDR had help in bringing American car companies to the brink. Democrats’ favorite target has always been corporate USA. Thanks to forty years of a Democrat controlled legislature, corporations pay the second highest corporate taxes in the world. Corporate federal tax is 35%, average state tax is 5%, thanks to compliance laws and regulatory restrictions, corporations spend 10% of their budgets on compliance. That’s 50% cost before they sell even one widget. And, the great unwashed wonders why manufacturing jobs have left this country. They left because of the left.

Democrats have routinely painted Wal-Mart as evil, greedy capitalists. They have promised to bankrupt the coal industry. They have taken an oath to dismantle our nuclear energy plants. They have accepted Japans extraordinary tariffs on U.S. automobiles while allowing million of Japanese cars into this country, tariff free. FYI, I blame Bush for this too. I mean really, we can’t upset the Japanese; they finance a great deal of our out of control federal spending.

Democrats have promised to get us off oil within ten years, even though, there is no reasonable replacement. They have blocked drilling for our domestic oil supplies. They have blocked the exploration of natural gas. Democrats have abdicated patriotism in favor of losing the war on terror. They have perpetrated a global warming hoax upon their constituencies designed to make carbon a commodity and enrich General Electric who, by the way, owns NBC and MSNBC, to news outlets considered the media wing of the Democrat party. Democrats got us into Vietnam, it took a Republican to kick Charlie’s ass and get a cease fire. Only to have it abrogated by a Democrat congress and communist expansionism. Democrats gave us the war on poverty, a $6 trillion transfer of wealth that rewarded failure and punished success.

Democrats gave us Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid and a myriad of other social engineering behemoths that will soon bankrupt this nation. Democrats gave us the sub-prime lending program, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac; this being the sole indicters of the current collapse of markets around the world and most probably the end of western civilization. Democrats gave us Bill Clinton, well known huckster, seller of technology to our enemies and stainer of dresses. It is the left that divided this country by encouraging Al, “I created the internet” Gore to steal the election of 2000. Democrats gave us political correctness, insuring a stifling of free speech. Where it’s legal, and “soon to be everywhere”, Democrats gave us gay marriage, abortion, sex education, bibles out of public classrooms and Rosie O’Donnell. Democrats gave us September 11, 2001 by not engaging an enemy that had vowed our destruction.

It was the Democrats who gave us affirmative action in an attempt to right one wrong with another wrong. It was the Democrats who gave us an Islamic theocracy in Iran by not supporting the Shah, whom by the way, was our ally. It was the Democrats who gave us Jimmy Carter, who gave us 70% obscene marginal tax rates, 12% inflation, double digit unemployment, gas lines and 21% mortgage interest rates. It is the Democrats constantly attempting to erode our second amendment rights. It is the Democrats adulterating our first amendment with the reinstatement of the, “fairness doctrine”.

Perhaps you see my prescient posit; if it’s broken, Democrats probably broke it. This is why I fear so much for this country, my country. For the American electorate to elect any Democrat to an office in stature above that of a common dog catcher gives me pause and great trepidation. A French philosopher once said, upon observing the experiment that was a collection of these United States, “it is a fine republic with a fatal flaw, once the people realize they can vote themselves treasure all will fail”. And, finally, Democrats have rewarded failure and bought a full forty percent of the electorate with handouts and treasure; proving, that not all Frenchmen are idiots, contrary to public perception.
Conservative Springfield 18 NOV 08

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Barry, the Constitution and Two Ply

Since Obama abdicated honesty by claiming to be the tax slasher and defender of the universe apparently he, “and his ilk” are attempting to double down; gut shoot the inside straight and blanket themselves in constitutional credence. Honestly, this takes more cajones than an elephant about to mount Rosie O’Donnell. Gee, even that picture makes me somewhat ill.

For those of us paying attention to the Obama instead of gushing homage we’ve noticed a call from the chosen one and his supporters to a return to the constitution and those founding principals abiding within the text. To the huddled masses chanting, “yes we can” this communal soliloquy might fly yet, for we in the top ten percent, firing over 90% of neurons along our synapsetic highway this is the epitome of lipstick on a pig.

Conservatives read our constitution much as liberals read a wine list with pinky finger outstretched. We know it, we get it and we are consumed by it. We believe it to be sacrosanct and unassailable. To we, the people, it is an inspired document of divine genesis. For liberals it is merely two ply on a scroll.

We have witnessed testimony, wherein posited profundities postulated that his holiest Barack conjoined with the ACLU, will end the transgression of Bush II and restore constitutionality to these amber waves of grain upon which God shed his grace. Oh really?

The ACLU was founded by a Communist, with communist ideals, communist goals, and they continue to impose a Communist like agenda on America daily. The founder of the ACLU, Roger Baldwin stated clearly… “My chief aversion is the system of greed, private profit, privilege and violence which makes up the control of the world today, and which has brought it to the tragic crisis of unprecedented hunger and unemployment Therefore, I am for Socialism, disarmament and ultimately, for the abolishing of the State itself, I seek the social ownership of property, the abolition of the propertied class and sole control of those who produce wealth. Communism is the goal.”
This revelation on its face would be, “in all intellectual circles” game, set and match. Yet, draw near and prepare to be dazzled with this soon to be award winning composition, for in this endeavor, with talent on loan from Rush, I draw inspiration from the almighty and have only just begun.
Federal Judge Phyllis Hamilton, “a Clinton appointee” recently upheld a ruling requiring seventh-grade students to pretend they're Muslims, wear Islamic garb, memorize verses from the Quran, pray to Allah and even to play "jihad games" in California public schools.(WND)

The ACLU has refused to comment on the ruling except to say they find, “nothing actionable” in the ruling. Translation: the ACLU doesn’t have a problem with it. If California public schools were requiring students to memorize Bible verses the ACLU would have lawyers kicking down the school doors and would be all over local school boards like Rosie O’Donnell on a baked ham. You just know they would.

In 1989 the ACLU began a crusade to remove the Mount Soledad Cross located in the center of a Korean War Memorial in San Diego, California. The Cross was erected in 1954. While continuing a battle to have the Cross removed they have defended Muslims who have demanded, “Foot Basins” in airports, football stadiums and other public places. Foot Basins are used by Muslims in preparation for prayer. "Why are we constructing places of worship for them inside our airports?" said an airport official who requested anonymity. "Why are we catering to their rituals? We don't do it for any other religion."(WND) As Christians, let’s ask airport officials for a chapel and see how long it takes for the ACLU to come to our aid. Waiting……….waiting……..

While absolutely berating pharmacists, who, “because of religious convictions” have refused to sell “Levonelle”, commonly referred to as the morning after pill. The ACLU defends Muslim taxi drivers who have refused to carry passengers who have been drinking alcohol or possess alcohol. The ACLU has even gone as far as to defend the rights of Muslim taxi drivers to refuse to carry blind patrons who avail themselves of a Seeing Eye dog. The Islamic religion considers dogs unclean. If Timmy’s in the well does it matter if Lassie has had a bath? In a related case, it wasn’t a surprise when the ACLU came to the defense of Muslims employed at Target stores who refused to scan pork products. Got Bacon?

At this point I imagine liberal foreheads to be throbbing and I know just how to push them over the edge. Abortion, utter the word and liberals go running for a soapbox. In 1973 the United States Supreme Court found a right to privacy in the constitution where one did not exist. Since then over 40 million abortions have been performed. Abortion angers conservatives on two fronts. We believe abortion to be immoral and an adulteration of our constitution.

The ACLU, “with a nod from the courts” has taken abortion out of the public debate, “or so they thought” and relegated this most important decision to nine justices and not to the people. Now, the ACLU is going after the tax exempt status of churches who dare speak out against abortion on moral grounds, calling such speech political. In 1987, the ACLU Foundation and the New York Civil Liberties Union filed an amicus brief in support of Abortion Rights Mobilization to secure standing in a suit challenging the tax exempt status of the Catholic Church. The Catholic Church was charged with violating its tax-exempt status by taking a stand against abortion. This is important and deserving of explanation. First the ACLU takes a pro-abortion stance and asks for judicial relief insomuch as abortion is a legal question to be removed from the political debate. After a Supreme Court affirmation of this argument the ACLU reverses itself and makes the wild claim that abortion is a political topic and those who would engage in the abortion debate are involved in political speech. That takes chutzpah folks.
The evidence is overwhelming and I could continue to list it for days. The ACLU is anti-Christianity and anti-American. There can be no other conclusion and those who would argue differently are either an order of French fries short of a happy meal of need to have their medications refilled.

Now; as to liberals suddenly drawing a bright red line as to constitutionality, this is just too damn easy, really it is. If you are a liberal with asthma, get your inhaler. If you’re a leftist alcoholic, get your ripple. And, if you’re Oprah, go shopping; you won’t understand this.

Article one, two and three provides for all federal powers allowed to our most benevolent government. {Sarcasm Mine} In little words, for you liberal little people those powers are these; provide for a common defense, negotiate international treaties and lastly, to settle disputes between the states in the arena of commerce. Period! To simplify; all of these sanctimonious social engineering programs exalted by Barry don’t pass the smell test or any constitutional one. Sorry, you anti-Zionist Zombies, you lose. Better luck next time. But hey, thanks for playing.
Conservative Springfield 13 Nov 08

Monday, November 10, 2008

Conservatism Won !!

While socialist liberals are dancing in the streets upon the election of their messiah, “Barack the merciful” they seemingly miss a cogent, prescient point. Simply; conservatism won, it always does. Recently published exit polls confirm this truism. According to Rasmussen and his staff of capable scribes, 59% of voters agreed with the Reagan mantra; “Government is not the solution, government is the problem”. The same percentage held true on taxes and overwhelmingly felt Osama Obama would lower their taxes.

To me that posit is striking. Republicans have let the democrats steal the fiscal responsibility bone and bury it in Lilliputian liberal town. Yet, we have to take responsibility, “somewhat” for our candidate of choice. Let’s face a reality; a stark and harsh pragmatism. The Republican Party hasn’t produced a conservative leader since Ronald Reagan. Dubya slipped under our radar with that, “compassionate conservative” tripe and increased the federal bureaucracy with Medicare prescription drugs. And, lest we suborn recent history; conservatives must admit a failing. It is that we defended Bush, in earnest, only because the left assailed him. After all, it is more than apparent that he is not a dyed in the wool conservative and never was. Perhaps Sarah Palin is right; Bush is somewhat faulted for our current loss because of his stray from the tenets of conservatives, blighting the republican brand.

True, we did nominate and support a brain dead, immigration wielding un-willing idiot for the top of our ticket. Though, he did promulgate unto the national stage the next Reagan, in a dress, sporting an assault rifle.
Still, the postmortem is undeniably positive, though short term a gray pale has been cast on the American horizon. Obama, in the last two electoral months was cast a tax cutter; strictly a conservative principal. This right turn, “as it were” did cement in my most fertile cranium a constant, an imperative. On the naming of Sarah Palin the oxygen left the Obama campaign and forced this Marxists to Reaganism. So, after all, conservatism won, even if it was a lie.

Yet, draw close and hold dear these presents; conservatives have a farm team, back benchers to date, though, in 2012 two names will be called upon for our revival. They are Sarah Palin and Bobby Jindal. I suspect Mr. Reagan would approve.
Conservative Springfield 11 Nov 08

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

We are now France

Ever wonder why the French wear white underwear? In case they have to surrender quickly, they’ll be ready. Well America, with the election of a tried and true radical socialist it’s safe to say we’re French toast.

Who would have thought that the continent inhabited by Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Jefferson and Andrew Jackson would turn into such a sniveling, spoiled, politically correct, spine incontinent, needy stepchild of King George the 8Th, this land of Daniel Boone, the Alamo, Pearl Harbor and the great westward migration.

A land founded upon rugged individualism, entrepreneurial activism, great inventions and freedom; this country born by patriots, strong and devout men, rigid morals and love of God. A place where country placed ahead of self and self interest. A continent rigidly clinging to the American neighborhood from coast to coast.

The one nation not afraid of its government but having the government afraid of its people. The one peoples not dependent upon government but constantly in avoidance of it. The nation most responsible for spreading freedom throughout the world. Home of those brave souls whom told a powerful King, “No More”. The country that sacrificed hundreds of thousands of its own citizenry to scour from its founding parchment the stain that was slavery.

And yet, on November fourth, 2008, this great land surrendered its constitution, its freedoms and its sovereignty for the treasure promised to the forty seven million of Americans choosing to abide the transference of wealth along with twenty million useful idiots. It’s striking to me, how this nation that defeated Nazi Germany, imperialist Japan and the evil empire would now bow at the feet of those enemies once so roundly dispatched. Yet, the deed is done.

The tide has come and gone. In one day America has surrendered what so many have died to protect and has done so exuberantly, with great fanfare and glee. History will long remember that day, November 4Th, 2008 as the day freedom on this planet became something whispered of, a flash of remembrance and as an appendix; removed and forgotten. Still, in the heart of patriots breathe will quicken at that whisper and hands will tighten upon pitchforks as that is their nature, their shared inheritance. In a word; our gift from God.
Conservative Springfield 05 NOV 08

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Why the polls are wrong!

It’s easy to get caught up in these wildly inflated presidential polls; that is, until they are explained and analyzed. First, one must understand the Barack Yo’Mama’s campaign strategy and all that it entails. Barack, “his most merciful” is employing the only two stratagems available to him; race and inevitability. His surrogates spend as much time gilding the American demographic as racist bigots were they not to worship at the holy alter of the messiah as Paris Hilton has spent without panties. However, the chosen one’s most lethal, “lethal is apt” weapon of strategy is the campaigns posit that this election is a fait accompli. And, with his accomplices in the media, positioned by ACORN, most polling data would confirm this juggernaut in a massive electoral coup. By the way, “coup” is apt also.

But, not so fast Barry. Many of we the people have more than a modicum of mental acumen. That’s right bubby; we’re on to you like Oprah on a baked ham. We’ve put two and two together and it ain’t five you mental midget. Now we know why ACORN has a symbiotic relationship with the Democratic Party and also the reason democrats have funded ACORN with our tax dollars. More specifically; “funding of $15 billion dollars in the last thirty years”. For the Native Americans in the audience, that’s a lot of wampum.
Election fraud is but an ancillary cherry on the sundae, polling is the target.

Polling 101; polls are weighted using mathematic algorisms dependent upon registered voters. In English, for democrats hanging on my every written word, let me simplify. Suppose in a state that registered democrats outnumber register republicans two to one. Poll takers then, “weight” their samples by two to one in favor of democrats. Meaning, they poll democrats two times as much as they poll republicans. Get the picture pappy?

Resulting in, “you guessed it” wildly inflated democrat margins. ACORN registering the Dallas Cowboys and Mickey Mouse is finally making sense. Just so you know; Mickey is a democratic rodent, much like Barack, the socialist squirrel. To quote the big guy; Rush Limbaugh, a squirrel is a rat with better P.R.

ACORN has registered millions of democrat rubes across these fruited plains resulting in skewed polls assailing the electorate of a left leaning tsunami about to drown us all. Don’t believe it for a second and up to date election results bear this out. In California, “land of the fruits and nuts” early voting has democrats and republicans represented in equitable numbers. Again, IN CALIFORNIA! In Florida, early voting exit polls predict a trouncing of Ayatollah Abama and a swearing in of vice president Sarah Palin.

Barry Barack is hell bent on overwhelming voters as to his inevitability thus, “he hopes” demoralizing republican purple thumbs and keeping the turnout low. It is his only chance. Yet, the fly in the ointment, the monkey in the wrench, and the hair in the soup is this; Obama has descended from on high and done his damnable best to convince those great unwashed that he is the savior. That he was brought forth into this world from a virgin birth. That he is Christ himself. Yet, at his peril he takes for granted this simple truism; our Bibles are plentiful and nowhere in that sacred book does it mention him. Palin wins, the country wins and Obama runs against Putin for the Russian presidency in 2012. Nuff Said.
Conservative Springfield 03 NOV 08

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Dear Congress,

Dear Congress,

The first amendment to our constitution states;

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

Most specifically, I wish to take advantage of my right to petition the government for a redress of grievances. As a tax paying, voting citizen I expect attention to each and every one of them and further demand a timely, concise reply. By the way, a few resignations are expected. My grievances are as follows;

1.I work at least five days a week, only to discover that a full one third of my gainful employment, over the course of my lifetime is spent filling the trough of government for people and special interest groups to feed at. The founding of this country entailed no income tax and I find it obscene that money is taken from my pay long before I see it and spent on things I wholly disagree with.


2.Those who actually spent precious blood in the birthing of America never envisioned the elected political leaders of this country as full time cronies suckling at the teat of hard working patriots. The valorous members of the first continental congress received no pay and actually pledged their fortunes to stake this honorable endeavor we now know as these United States. They served because of their love of country. Today I am forced to endure carnival hucksters who have made a career of politics and retiring millionaires. Modern day politicos cannot be distinguished between prostitutes or politicians. Though, at least prostitutes can take a shower at the end of the day, “night” and become clean again. Politicians will forever have the stench of corruption upon them and carry it to their maker. My only hope is that as they approach those pearly gates John Adams and Thomas Jefferson are waiting outside the fence with axe handles and pitchforks.


3.Our constitution allows our federal government very limited powers. After all, the framers were separating from an oppressive King George and trusted not another monolithic entity. No, our founders entrusted freedom in, “we the people” and limited the scope of governmental intrusion into the lives of the electorate. Federal powers as enumerated in article one, two and three of our constitution strictly limit federal authority in three, “and only three” areas of federal injection into our lives. That being; provide for a common defense, settle disputes between the several states only in the arena of commerce and negotiate international treaties. Done, fini, end of story. Those of you in congress have not only adulterated our sacred constitution you have belied those great men’s virtue who made it possible for you to breathe freedom.


4. “To take from one, because it is thought his own industry and that of his fathers has acquired too much, in order to spare to others, who, or whose fathers, have not exercised equal industry and skill, is to violate arbitrarily the first principle of association, the guarantee to everyone the free exercise of his industry and the fruits acquired by it.” — Thomas Jefferson, letter to Joseph Milligan, April 6, 1816
“A wise and frugal government… shall restrain men from injuring one another, shall leave them otherwise free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned. This is the sum of good government.” — Thomas Jefferson, First Inaugural Address, March 4, 1801
“Congress has not unlimited powers to provide for the general welfare, but only those specifically enumerated.” — Thomas Jefferson
“The moment the idea is admitted into society that property is not as sacred as the laws of God, and that there is not a force of law and public justice to protect it, anarchy and tyranny commence. If ‘Thou shalt not covet’ and ‘Thou shalt not steal’ were not commandments of Heaven, they must be made inviolable precepts in every society before it can be civilized or made free.” — John Adams, A Defense of the Constitutions of Government of the United States of America, 1787
“With respect to the two words ‘general welfare,’ I have always regarded them as qualified by the detail of powers connected with them. To take them in a literal and unlimited sense would be a metamorphosis of the Constitution into a character which there is a host of proofs was not contemplated by its creators.” — James Madison in a letter to James Robertson
In 1794, when Congress appropriated $15,000 for relief of French refugees who fled from insurrection in San Domingo to Baltimore and Philadelphia, James Madison stood on the floor of the House to object saying:
“I cannot undertake to lay my finger on that article of the Constitution which granted a right to Congress of expending, on objects of benevolence, the money of their constituents.” — James Madison, 4 Annals of Congress 179, 1794
“[T]he government of the United States is a definite government, confined to specified objects. It is not like the state governments, whose powers are more general. Charity is no part of the legislative duty of the government.” — James Madison
Those quotes should give pause to all elected federal representation. For instance, reflect if you will the fate of Benito Mussolini. For ignoring the expressed will and intent of our founding documents, the sacrament and cornerstone of this republic a fate awaits you long winded public servants. Whether it is here or in eternity; to take money from one person and give it to someone unknown by the donor is almost blasphemous and surely damnable. By rewarding failure and punishing success you have guaranteed more of one and less of the other.


5.Though I can’t speak for God I do spend a great portion of my waking and slumber hours speaking to him. By atoning to the poor by keeping them impoverished I suspect there will be a special place in hell for you. You have positioned the poor against the rich in the cage match for the ages. Instead of holding up success as attainable and an example to those unwashed downtrodden plebes you have incited class warfare and scorned success. Thereby, assigning the impoverished as your voting block and ensuring continued poverty thus discarding lives.


6.Finally, yet not completely by any means, I’m on to you; I get it. The only difference between you and a bag of excrement is the bag and on reflection, perhaps comparing you to excrement is an insult to excrement. I think I can speak for all Americans when I say this; we as a people have figured this out. You rubes in $30 dollar suits show up in Washington and after thirty years of bending over the American taxpayer you retire as multi-millionaires. And, know this; that glow you see just over the Potomac is the growing crowd of, “we the people” lighting our torches and sharpening our pitchforks. Sleep tight.

Conservative Springfield 30 OCT 08

Monday, October 27, 2008

America; Epilogue

As America squats upon the precipice of electing a dyed in the wool socialist, hell bent on destroying the country that made him into the wealthy elitist he truly is, I can’t help feeling that we are quite simply reaping what we have sown. For we have taken the gift that is America, “paid for in blood by patriots” and adulterated it beyond all recognition. We have inherited the dreams and aspirations of those founders only to squander them as irrelevant or antiquated.
Apparently we have a majority of citizens ready to willingly embrace socialism when it was capitalism combined with the entrepreneurial spirit of ordinary people most responsible for American exceptionalism. In just over two hundred years we, as a country, have bested the rest of the world in every form of human endeavor. We have the highest standard of living known to man. For all of the hyperbolic hyperbole about poverty across these fruited plains even the supposed impoverished are fat and happy mired in their muck. We have six billion people weighing down this orb and more than half of them do so without such luxuries as electricity and running water. And yet we complain and demand change.
What has spoiled this country is the separation from those founders, from their ideals combined with our tepid faith in our constitution and God. John Adam’s said, “We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Avarice, ambition, revenge or gallantry would break the strongest cords of our Constitution as a whale goes through a net. Our Constitution is designed only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate for any other”.
Until 1948 the bible and God was an integral component in the rearing and education of America’s youth. 1949 stands out as the first year of a decline in scholastic achievement.
Speak to anyone of public school matriculation and, on balance, the most favored response to religion in the classroom is the oft repeated separation of church and state. Yet, no such language exists in our founding documents and those who born this country couldn’t imagine a populace so ill informed as to the bible and the word of God.
Still, highlighted in this misconception is the apt labeling of an ill informed electorate as to the content and context of our founding documents; the cornerstone of this representative republic.
It is saddening to realize that those men, Adams, Jefferson, Franklin, et al, pledged their lives, their fortunes and their sacred honor to foster a country now inhabited by spoiled children willing to follow the latest pied piper into an ideology that has miserably failed every time it’s been tried.
The tenets of socialism are directly proportional to our national debt, our porous borders, our entitlement mentality, the current financial crisis, our bloated bureaucracy, abortion, gay marriage and the rapid moral and social decay infecting the body whole that is America. Now, it seems, the great unwashed residing in this divinely inspired republic is desirous to not only dip their respective feet in the communal socialist pool but jump head first off the high dive and become totally immersed. This only confirms a suspicion I’ve held for some time; Mr. Adam’s was right. Without religion and morality our constitution survives not. However, in another sense, perverted as it is, it is only common sense. After all, checkers sells more than chess. And I can’t recall the last time I gazed upon the New York Times best seller list and recognized the King James edition of our holy bible gracing that population.
Conservative Springfield 27 OCT 08

Monday, October 20, 2008

Random Thoughts

Considering the stakes and the current location of democrat v. republican fulcrum placement, the muscle belying my clavicle insist McCain/Palin is awarded the gold star in electoral mathematics. However, beguiling my heart is the electrical activity within my cranium, crackling the synopses with a greater static charge. For it is without undue modesty and self deprecation that I have gazed into the future and found it wanting. This confidence of credit, “care of the democrats” ensures that those clouds upon our fiscal horizon bear storms and tidings of monumental doom. Whosoever commands the rudder that is these several states, will face a head wind of biblical proportions and thus incur the wrath of its populace, in all measures of demographics. Why then, would thinking conservatives, purport to support the blighting of Sarah Palin by association with four years of pestilence and political purgatory? For those in the audience who might have matriculated insomuch and throughout our public schools, paying fraught attention to recess while endeavoring sublime sweet slumber midst the application of social studies let me be succinct. And, postulate a profundity; the next four years will require the electorate to bite the excrement sandwich and swallow it whole. Contrary to the will and entrepreneurial spirit of, “we the people” foisted upon America is the doom and gloom of a democrat inspired recession at best and a super depression at worst. This prescient posit is neither unassailable nor avoidable. It will be done. So, I would postulate this; why would we waste Sarah on a hold-em draw with all of our outs out? Of course, Barry is more than slightly left of Lenin and Marx and provided Mao se-Barry had the resources to tank these fruited plains I have no doubt he would Carter us into oblivion yet, see rule one of a recession. Empty coffers and rampant inflation will tie this media mogul into a bobble headed Bozo with Dumbo ears, unable to finance the convergence of fries with a coke. That’s right MacDonald’s, you owe me a residual, and I’ll take fries with that.
Where is the political profitability in mucking in the mire wherein snake eyes is considered the best outcome and a hard eight is the motets of our financial communion.
Nope, let the financial meltdown be hung upon the democrats as Karma would suggest and let it be smiling Sarah, “and hopefully Bobby Jindal” upon the pedestal to smite the Obama in 2012, God willing.

Those financial funksters supposedly fending off our financial ruin haven’t a clue as to economic principals and workings of commerce at large. Thankfully you have me; a veritable cornucopia of capital principals, also known as cash money. Fiducially, America has an entitlement crisis. I have one rock upon which to rest my sacred honor and it is a skipper upon the waters of these United States. From here to forward, seatbelts are not simply compulsory, nay, they are a rudiment to sanity and safety; for enlightenment bestowed is perceived as a Lincoln stuck on high beam barreling right at you. Let your conscience be your guide.
Let’s get started; social security will soon bankrupt this country and the recent Popsicle credit freeze has paralyzed our economy, making us all rub noses and wear parkas. This is so simple, credit conservatism, and…. my giant brain for the positive magnetic response to negative mercurial negativism, piled high and steaming like the dung it is.
There is a positive outcome, and, upon reflection, one takes from this fomented financial farce, focused fervently, feverishly, upon fresh faced fanatics is the folly forwarded by those few unable to comprehend the seemingly incomprehensible.
This is simple, even in the abstract. Banks need dough, cash, moullah, hey…even junk in the trunk. And, social security is vamping 30% of our budget. Again, buck up buckaroo, all is not lost or forgotten, for the answer is conservatism; as usual.
America is tethered to forty-seven million seasoned citizens via the social security lifeline. Since Chuck Hesston has removed Soylent Green as an option let us explore plan “B” and the brilliance of a fertile mind, un-tethered.
Stay with me here; instead of nationalizing our biggest banks by infusing them with liquidity in return for preferred stock; I.E. “ownership” let us take those forty-seven million recipients of SSI and make them rich. That’s right granny; you just hit the mother load. But, not so fast; before grandma tries to convert her dollars to cat food there is that pesky codicil. Jointly sharing her passbook is, “we the people” or everyone’s favorite uncle; Sam. Yup, it’s a joint account with rights of survivorship ingrained and accepted. So, in theory our SSI recipients have $500,000.00 in a joint account with Uncle Sam. At five percent interest Fred and Ethel will receive $25,000.00 per annum; a windfall much greater than current social security disbursements. Banks would receive $700 billion dollars, “in $500k deposits” virtually ending the credit crisis and producing a river of liquidity. America would detach SSI from its ledger for good and banks would so endow each recipient with five percent. Upon the certain death, “death is certain” the treasury would recoup that deposit, costing taxpayers zero. We get rid of federally funded social security forever and solve the credit crisis for good.
Yes, we would have continuing expenditures for those fifty and older yet; that output will be short lived. Those under fifty still have a SSI deduction, matched by their employer, and placed in several approved money market accounts. This essentially privatizes SSI while solving our credit woes at no cost to the taxpayer.
As usual; I await your applause and accolades.
Conservative Springfield 21 OCT 08